For today I am,
Seeing... The sun attempting to peek through grey clouds... dried grass and a pink butterfly bush past its prime... hydrangea bushes sporting a hodge podge of lush and fried blossoms (the weird weather this year confuses the poor things)... a freshly opened rose on the bush next to the fence...
Hearing... The clink of forks on plates and the licking of fingers (we're eating at our desks this morning)... squirrel chatter, bird chirps, and distant freeway noises... palm fronds scraping the side of the Pepto Bismol pink garage as the wind kicks up... the whisper of that wind through the doomed tree's troublesome branches - it sounds like the sea...
Tasting... Eggs scrambled with chopped kale and salsa... fruit and yogurt smoothie... black tea.... I've been missing bread this week. I dreamt of piles of toast last night, and all week I've longed for sandwiches and tortilla chips and tacos. Last night we had the Paleo version of sandwiches, and it was good, but just not the same.
Working... Oh, that. Hmmmm... Mostly house work and office work and soul work this week. My resume is trapped on my old, dead laptop. We've planned a rescue attempt, but it has to wait a couple weeks. We're out of printer ink anyway, and we're going on vacation next week, so the job search will star in earnest upon our return. Meanwhile I'm in the garage sorting through boxes. We are in purge and organize mode these days.
Reading... I'm a day late to the library, so I'll have fees to pay and I don't have anything new to share. I finished the Widow Clicquot (ok, mostly I enjoyed learning about how wine is made), and Madame X (much better, poor Amelie - the Kim Kardashian of her day), and the Guernsey book (love!). MM and I also finally finished Harry Carr (what a delightful writer! I want to tour California now, and definitely want to find more of his writing) and our interminable Anne run. There are three more books in the series, but I don't own them, and we're a bit worn out. We'll get to them later. Now's the time for new things. Here's the current stack:
Bookbag - The Story of Philosophy by Will Durant
Nightstand - Birthright: The True Story That Inspired Kidnapped by.... someone. Don't have the book handy, and can't remember
- Changes that Heal by Henry Cloud
- Hearing God by Dallas Willard
- Pascale's Nose by... another someone. Same comment as above.
There's less going on now, bookwise. I think MM and I are going to strip down our read-alouds to one fiction and one non-fiction at a time, so that we don't have too much happening at once.
Learning... Uh... Well I'm reading about philosophy and historical people, so I suppose I'm learning things that way.
Creating... Today feels taken up with errands and such, so I'm not sure I'll create much. I think I may crochet while I watch a show tonight. I found a bunch of granny squares in the garage that I'll attach together to make a baby blanket or something. The fast track to a finished object! And write. It feels like a day to write.
Dreaming... Of work clothes. That's something I miss about working. I love office clothes. Shoes and slacks and tweed skirts and cardigans - the whole bit. When I drive MM to work on the days I have the car, I always check out the clothes of the women walking to their offices. I miss that. I miss getting dressed up and walking into my office holding my coffee and my briefcase. I also miss meetings. I'm an introvert, but for some reason, I really like work meetings. I know. Weird.
Pondering... This is a season of intense growth and healing. Purge and organize seems to be the theme for my inner life as well as my pink garage. Unpacking boxes, blowing the dust off, examining, evaluating - do I need this? does it add to my happiness? detract? what do I think of it? what do I feel about it? should I save this, or let it go? Lots to think about as I evaluate 40 years of experiences, ideas, and relationships.
Thankful for... Warm tea... the new rose... MM working at home today... ocean weather... candles... shrinking piles... crossed off lists... the peek-a-boo sun... a day to write.