It has seemed to me that each year one should pause to take stock of himself, to ask: Where am I going? What am I becoming? What do I wish to do and become? Most people whom I encountered were without purpose, people who had given themselves no goal. The first goal need not be the final one, for a sailing ship sails first by one wind, then another. The point is that it is always going somewhere, proceeding toward a final destination. ~ Mathurin Kerbouchard*
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God can't steer a ship that isn't moving. ~ Some Inspirational Christian
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I'm changing careers.
I mean, it's not that I won't ever do what I did before, its just that I will never do it in the same way. The work itself can be fun and creative, but I keep ending up in dysfunctional work environments that I am powerless to change.
And there are other things I'd rather do.
It's been a long time since I've had the freedom to even imagine a different life, and I'm out of practice. Out of touch with my passions. So, I'm not exactly sure what the next thing is. And while I love being on sabbatical, and having this opportunity to rest and heal, I've been going a bit stir crazy, trying to figure out what to do next.
My poor husband, every two weeks I tell him, "I need to get a job." (Last time I'd cooked up a scheme to go work in a garden nursery. Even though I know next to nothing about plants. Before that, I was going to be a receptionist. Or work at a bakery. Which. Um, hello. I can barely get out of bed at 7 am, let alone 4:30!)
So, instead of going crazy, or getting a random job, I'm going to just do stuff with my brain, and pray that things will click into place, eventually.
I'm helping MM with a couple technical writing projects. I'm working on three of my own non-blog writing projects. I'm setting aside time to practice music and art (drawing, specifically). And I've started my Anti-Applesauce Coursework in Philosophy and Geography. More stuff is on deck, but I gotta ease into this.
Hopefully, these will get my ship moving again, and we'll see what comes of it.
* Heh. Heh. I love that I can use Kerbouchard for an inspirational quote. I'm going to try to find more of them. Prepare.