For today I am:
Seeing... I'm mostly at my "desk" today. Earlier this month we hauled my old white desk out to the curb, and I set up one of our long fold-up tables in my corner of the office. A mustard yellow table cloth matches the giant Lord of the Rings map of Middle Earth above the table. And elsewhere spots of red bring cheer: a square pot for my desk plant, a lamp, Ikea boxes for office supplies, my mouse and mouse pad, a lovely little fabric-covered, gilt-edged copy of Pride and Prejudice from Book Girl, and a paper frame around a crayon drawing MM gave me. In front of me are a few chotchkies and a fanciful box for stationary, covered in flowers and fairies and doilies and whatnot. It doesn't fit any of my other stuff, but I like it anyway. Go figure.
Hearing... The lawn guys mowing and blowing and hollering at each other... ticking clocks... my tummy rumbling for a snack...
Tasting... Right now: a handful of Trader Joe's salt and pepper potato chips. Later: Homemade chicken soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. (Gruyere on whole wheat bread. Yum!)
Working... Today's Lineup: Dishes, Laundry, Iron Shirts, Mend Clothes, Clean Out Weird Stuff From Fridge, Toilet, Tub*, Counters, Mirrors, Sink, File Papers, Answer Giant Mountain of Email, Scan/Transcribe Documents... It's a lot. Why am I still blogging?
*Cleaning the tub involves the weekly unclogging of the drains. Old house. Old pipes. Can't use liquid plumber-esque stuff, so its a fun baking soda/vinegar/boiling water treatment instead.
Reading... Still working on Salt. Also reading the aforementioned Pride and Prejudice. And lots and lots of articles on Biblical Criticism (see below). Lots. My brain is nearly fried. Better get some more potato chips...
Learning... About the various theories on who wrote/edited/compiled/transcribed the Jewish bible. I am a writing/literature nerd, so it has been fascinating to see all the connections/reactions to history, politics, art, culture, etc. unfolding in the documents. This quote on Straight Dope sums up the impact:
"Questions of provenance notwithstanding, the text is one of the great works of literature. It has endured for at least 2,500 years, parts of it for at least 3,200 years, and is still read today. There is hardly a work of art or writing in the western world that does not build from the five books or use images or phrases from them. Our notions of good and evil, of history as a linear process, of the relationship between the individual and morality, of the dignity of man ("created in the image of God"), all stem from this seminal work."
Creating... Decorations for a wedding shower. :)
Dreaming... Simple dreams right now... a quiet evening to toast the end of summer... another quiet evening of twinkle-lights to toast an engagement... a morning of art and an afternoon of riding bikes along the river...
Pondering... Truth. Beauty. Purpose. The long-neglected needs/wants/dreams of my heart. Old wounds. New ideas. And the new template I must build for life and relationship. How does this all work? Some days its all clear, and others... not so much. But I will keep pondering.
Thankful for... I know I sound like a broken record, but MM has been so good to me. My heart has been rocked hard several times this week and he has listened and comforted and encouraged, and best of all - understood. For reals. He just gets stuff. And I am amazed. He hopes when I can't. He has faith when mine fails. And he dreams Big Awesome Dreams for me when I just don't see how. I still can't get used to this love.